Jesus was an Asshole
Christians seem to have the greatest public relations department. Even many atheists seem to think that Jesus was some white guy with a long beard who wandered the Middle East trying to bring about world peace. According to the Bible, Jesus was a real asshole.
Sure everyone knows about the golden rule and the character of Jesus does have a few other great messages too. But they are few and far between especially when you read some of the other things that Jesus preached.
While everyone knows that the character of Jesus said to love one’s enemies and turn the other cheek, he also said the opposite of that very same philosophy:
“But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay [them] before me.” – Luke 19:27
Some Christians think Jesus was all about loving everyone, but if one actually read the entire Bible rather than just the parts of the Gospels that are preached in church, people would see a very different side of Jesus. Let’s see what Jesus has to say about family values:
”If any [man] come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.” – Luke 14:26
People seem to think of Jesus as the “Prince of Peace” and yet that title never appears in the New Testament at all. Not only is Jesus never once referred to as the “Prince of Peace” the character of Jesus actually seems to be a pretty violent character.
“If thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast [it] from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not [that] thy whole body should be cast into hell. And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast [it] from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not [that] thy whole body should be cast into hell.” – Matthew 5:29
Plus, Jesus specifically refutes the idea that he came in peace. I don’t know if the character could have made it any clearer than this:
“Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword” – Mathew 10:34
Christians always tell me that this is a metaphor. Well no shit. I didn’t think Jesus actually wielded a sword around. But what is it a metaphor for? If Jesus had said that he didn’t come to send peace, but flowers then we might conclude that he was more about love than peace. But a sword is a metaphor for violence and fighting. So when someone says that they came with a sword, it seems to mean that they are looking for a fight. Add to this that he specifically states that he didn’t come to send peace and the meaning couldn’t possibly be clearer. The only way we can interpret that to mean that he was the Prince of Peace is if we took to words to mean the exact opposite of what they actually mean; sort of like Michael Jackson’s use of the word, bad.
Finally, there is a story that is rarely told about Jesus in which he pretty much acts like an asshole. His friends who seem to be better people than he is have to really put some peer pressure on him to do the right thing.
“And, behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, [thou] Son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil. But he answered her not a word. And his disciples came and besought him, saying, Send her away; for she crieth after us. But he answered and said, I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel. Then came she and worshipped him, saying, Lord, help me. But he answered and said, It is not meet to take the children’s bread, and to cast [it] to dogs. And she said, Truth, Lord: yet the dogs eat of the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table. Then Jesus answered and said unto her, O woman, great [is] thy faith: be it unto thee even as thou wilt. And her daughter was made whole from that very hour.” – Mat 15:22-28
Christians tell me that Jesus was such a great moral teacher and that even without the blood sacrifice he was the greatest guy who ever lived, but I really don’t see it. He seems no different than any other cult leader who is concerned more about himself than he is about others. In short, the character of Jesus just seems like an asshole.
Filed under: family values, image of god, morality, Neighbor, Preaching, Real Christians, Religion, the bible, wwjd