My Pal Jesus
The other day I was talking to a Christian friend of mine and she made a comment that I always find even more ridiculous than most Christian comments. I wish I could say that it was a unique comment by some random schizophrenic or something, but I can’t. The sad fact is that my friend wasn’t schizophrenic and that this wasn’t the first time I have heard this particular rhetoric. So here it is; my Christian friend told me that she hates religion. Just think about that one for a moment or two and let it bounce around in your head a bit. In fact, let me repeat it, because it bears repeating. My Christian friend told me that she hates religion.
So I had to point out the elephant in the room and inform her that Christianity is actually a religion and that she is actually very religious. Of course I did know where she was going with this and of course she did indeed go there. “Christianity is not a religion, it is a relationship with God,” was her dogmatic reply as if reading a script for an audition. This is a line I have heard far too often and it really is pretty crazy. I wish there was a nicer way of phrasing it, but my friend actually thinks of Jesus as a personal friend… and not in a metaphorical way either. No, she and many other Christians at least think that they treat Jesus as an actual flesh and blood friend. I would have almost expected her to buy Jesus food when we went out for lunch. Seriously though, I think there is or at least ought to be a rule that say’s that your friends have to actually exist and stuff. Let’s fact reality, you can’t go paling around with Jesus. You can’t have an intellectual conversation with Jesus. You can’t hug Jesus. You can’t kiss Jesus. And you most certainly can’t have an intimate relationship with Jesus. Jesus isn’t real!
Christianity is a religion and this type of make-believe is even more ridiculous that the already obvious make-believe that makes up the rest of this ridiculous religion. It is like saying that the already make-believe story of Christianity is too real and so we need to add another layer of make-believe and then call that reality. I’m sorry, but that is not reality. That takes one further away from reality.
