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TSA ‘Prove You Are Not a Terrorist’

Posted on November 30th, 2010 by Staks

So lately the media has been obsessed with the TSA’s body scanners and pat downs. I am pretty sure that the body scanners have been in use for months but have only filtered down to the news media’s attention recently. In any case, we don’t really need either the scanners or the pat down. It is really easy to prove to the TSA that you are not a terrorist.

First, it is important to note that America is really sexually prudish, but not nearly as prudish as our Islamic fundamentalist enemies. It seems that we allow warrentless wiretapping, permit torture, are willing to fight two very costly wars which are in large part responsible for our deficit problems, but when it comes to a detailed x-ray like photo of our private parts, we have to draw the line.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like the full body scanners either, but I drew the line much earlier. While TSA promises that those photos can’t be saved, many have already circulated around the internet. If a celebrity goes through one of those things, it would be on TMZ or PerezHilton in two seconds.

This brings me to two recent incidents which may not have filtered down to the media’s attention. The first is from Germany. It is a protest of these full body scanners. Those protesting dropped their pants and took off their shirts and protested in their underwear. Take a look:

The second incident might have started out a little bit more ambitiously. American porn star and blogger FurryGirl planned to get naked for the scanner. As it turned out TSA would rather she cover up. Her video of the incident was a bit on the lame side. I was really expecting much more… or should I say, much less. Still, it was an interesting attempt. You can read about the experience on her blog, Feminisnt.com. Oh, and she’s a vocal atheist.

In any case, these pioneers have shown me that the best way to prove to TSA that you are not a terrorist is to strip down and get naked. Let’s face facts here. TSA are primarily worried about Muslim terrorists and contrary to popular belief, not all Arabs are Muslims and not all Muslims are Arabs. So the old racial profiling thing doesn’t really cut it. Getting naked is the only way to prove that you are not a Muslim terrorist.

Now I know not all Muslims are terrorists, but being prudish because of religion is stupid anyway. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think TSA should force anyone to be naked, but I do think that if we were to voluntarily get naked, it would really prove to TSA that we are not Muslim terrorists.

As for the scanners and pat downs, they are stupid. If America was really serious about stopping terrorism, we would educate people about science and be much more critical of ridiculous religious ideas. Take religion away from the terrorists and we problem miraculously goes away… no gods necessary for that miracle.