American’s Next Top Stupid Republican
The Republicans really do need a game show. It used to be that Republicans just had a token stupid person in office like former Vice-President Dan Quayle but that just wasn’t stupid enough. So then the Republicans elected America’s stupidest President, George W. Bush. Some Republicans however claimed that Bush Jr. was actually a secret genius who was just playing stupid. This is a pretty stupid belief and most Americans didn’t really buy that one anyway. At least there was some desire on the Republican Party to claim intellect at least.
More recently, the Republican Party gave us the Vice Presidential candidate and former Alaskan Governor Sarah Palin. Her rise to prominence was based on being twice as religious and twice as stupid as our former President George W. Bush. She is so stupid that in the same speech in which she announced that she was quitting the position of Governor, she insisted that she was not a quitter. She’s so stupid that she thought strong foreign policy experience meant that she could see Russia from her house… interestingly enough, it wasn’t Russia she saw from her house it was an Obama sign on her neighbor’s lawn. Fortunately, Mrs. Death Panels’ fifteen minutes of fame seems to be nearing its end.
But then we have the new crop of elected Republican idiots. Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann is desperately trying to be the next Sarah Palin. It started when she insinuated that there are anti-American people serving in our government, but more recently she stated that the best way to defeat health care reform is to pray and fast. But that wasn’t dumb enough, so then she wanted Republicans to come together and slit their wrists as some kind of blood oath to stop health care reform. Don’t worry, she’s not advocating suicide, she’s just dumb.
I could go on, but we have to get to our next contestant, Governor Bobby Jindal who came to fame by telling the American people that money going to research when volcano’s could erupt was a waste. It didn’t take long before that money saved a lot more money and lives. The evils of science I guess. But Jindal’s stupidity isn’t so much what he says, but what he has done. By his own account, in college he and some friends held a girl down, restrained her, and exorcised her demons. I wonder whether his demons were exorcised that night as well… wink wink.
But those are just the actual elected officials. The fact is that there is a whole spin off game show for the pundits. It used to be that Rush Limbaugh said the stupidest and craziest things despite that fact that he probably isn’t all that stupid, but just says these things to get attention. But then along came Sean Hannity to give Rush a run for his money with similar nonsense. Despite Hannity’s attempt to be American’s Next Top Craziest Republican Pundit, he never really got into the game. Bill O’Reilly on the other hand made a serious run for the top spot of pinhead of the week.
Then along came Glen Beck. While on the radio, Beck was the most sane of the lot, but put a camera in front of the man and all hell breaks loose. Now even Time Magazine has declared Beck the winner of the loony bin asylum. From evil left wing conspiracies to repeatedly crying for America on the air, Beck knocks it out of the park. The man calls President Barack Obama a racist and then says that he don’t think Obama hates white people in the same sentence.
Of course, the politicians and the pundits are just two thirds of the stupid and insane Republican Party. Trinity of stupidity is complete when you add the Republican base. All you have to do is watch some of these townhall events and the 9-12 rally in D.C. to see just how stupid the Republican base really is. Then there are the “Teabaggers.” For the record these mostly homophobia people called themselves that name. Perhaps they did not do a google search on the term, “Teabagger.” I think they would be quite surprised to find out what pops up. From the Birthers to the Teabaggers the Republican base may need their own spin off game show called, “America’s Got Stupid.”
Filed under: culture war, palin, Politics
