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Jesus vs. Santa

Every year, fundamentalist Christians get upset that Santa is all over the place and Jesus is not represented as much as they think he ought to be. They put up signs that say, “Jesus is the reason for the season” and “Keep the Christ in Christmas.” It is a genuine feud between two imaginary people, sort of like who would win Batman vs. Superman?

Of course, this feud was also the start for South Park which has now been on the air for a billion years. But it started with a short cartoon called, “The spirit of Christmas” in which Jesus and Santa went after each other.

Personally, I love watching Christians fight over their imaginary friends. Personally, I am putting my money on Santa. He has the weight advantage and Jesus already got crucified. Santa is more fun for the kids too. I mean have you ever seen images of Jesus? He is usually mostly naked and being violently tortured. Santa is jolly.

Jesus makes you feel guilty for being human and sends you to Hell to be tortured for all eternity if you don’t worship him. Santa gets you toys. Jesus hangs out with 12 losers while Santa hangs out with fun loving elves, lying reindeer, and Mrs. Claus.

No wonder Christians are upset about Santa Claus, he is so much better than their stupid old Jesus. In a straight up battle between the two Santa Claus wins every time. Ho ho ho, Jesus.

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  • Steve-n-SA

    Of the two fictional characters, I’ll take Santa, at least he doesn’t punish people for thinking on their own. But, I didn’t know the reindeer where known to be liars :-)

  • http://www.dangeroustalk.net Staks

    lol, that was supposed to be “flying.” My keyboard sucks.

  • http://www.socialinjustices.net dlevitt

    Some of those mean little reindeer were liars. Always hurting poor little Bambi’s…err, Rudolph’s feelings. Made him run away from home one time. Shame, little liars. Personally, I always got to eat Santa’s left over cookies the morning after he had visited, so my vote goes to Santa hands down.